I enjoyed being a woman for a night." Would you ever want to do it again?" My sensible head says no, but there is an excitement in my belly thatsays yes. This is scary. What demon have we unleashed? What did you feelwatching my antics?" My main feeling was excitement. It was fascinating watching you exploreand discover new things about yourself. I have always been aware that youhave a strong female side to the way that you interact with people. Itwas what attracted me to you in the first place. You know that I ambisexual and you appeal to both sides of me. I have enjoyed the last fewweeks. I am a bit worried about what I may have awakened in you, but itmay be a journey that we were bound to be on sometime. If I lose you as aresult of opening this door, then what will be, will be. I do not intendto lose you, I love you far too much and you are the centre of my life."We sat lost in thought, just cuddling for a long time."Did you enjoy being Laura?" Yes." Do you want to be a woman. "They kidnapped my wife and son," I reminded him. "Estrada threatened to kill them, several times. What would you have done?" The same," he said immediately. "If I could. I'm not blaming you, I'm impressed. Es­trada was a fucking horror, a latter-day Jackal." He was referring to another, earlier terrorist, coincidentally also named Carlos although with different—and multiple—surnames, who'd plagued the international community a decade or so earlier."Yes," I said, remembering the menace of the man."The world's better off without him," he said firmly. "Him and the ones with him. We have dossiers on them, too. Do you want to see?"I thought about Joe's casually cruel search of me and shook my head. No, I didn't care to know anything more about any of them."I think I've pretty much pieced together what happened," he said. "Every light bulb in the place blown—" Not quite every one," I interrupted. "Thank God." Mmm," he agreed. "Just the one string. And the laptop, or what was left of it..
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